scripture and prayer reflection
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Lyrics
Jesus, lover of my soul
Let me to thy bosom fly
While the nearer waters roll
While the tempest still is high
Hide me, oh my Savior, hide
Till the storm of life is past
Safe into the haven guide
Oh receive my soul at last
Other refuge have I none
Hangs my helpless soul on thee
Leave, ah! Leave me not alone
Still support and comfort me
All my trust on thee is stayed
All my help from thee I bring
Cover my defenseless head
With the shadow of thy wing
Thou, oh Christ art all I want
More than all in thee I find
Raise thou fallen, cheer the faint
Heal the sick and lead the blind
Just and holy is thy name
I am all unrighteousness
False and full of sin I am
Thou art full of truth and grace
Plenteous grace with thee is found
Grace to cover all my sin
Let the healing streams abound
Make and keep me pure within
Thou of life the fountain art
Freely let me take of thee
Spring thou up within my heart
Rise to all eternity
Psalm 63:2-8
2 So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
3 Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
4 So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands.
5 My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
6 when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
7 for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
8 My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me.
Romans 5:3-5
3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Reflection
In this traditional hymn penned by Charles Wesley shortly after coming to faith, the lyrics “Thou O Christ art all I want, more than all in Thee I find” acknowledge a reality that we don’t always recognize - that God is our true and deepest need. He is the only thing that will truly satisfy our restless hearts.
The trouble is, we may not feel able to honestly sing along contentedly that Christ is all we want, because there are other things we want too - comfort, security, happiness, etc. There may be unmet longings in our hearts that are long standing, and we wrestle with the frustration and pain of our own inability to meet or change them. What do we do with these longings, these frustrations, these pains? How do we hold them alongside knowing that God is our only real help, real purpose, real source of life at all times? How do we experience what feels, at times, so removed from our daily life?
In the midst of extended unfulfilled longing in my life, I’ve found I can better bear up under the weight when I look at and walk with Jesus, keeping my heart intentionally turned toward remembering Him and His love for me as the defining reality of my life. It’s not about pulling myself up by my bootstraps or looking on the bright side of things. It’s about turning to and being with Jesus in the pains and frustrations, knowing that He understands the weight, even as He also asks me to walk this path. Contentment is easier when I’m focused on Him and His love for me, rather than on what I feel I’m lacking.
There are even moments when I realize how short my desires fall, that He is abundantly more than all I am longing for. C. S. Lewis writes in The Weight of Glory,
“We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and
ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants
to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is
meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
We so often get so caught up in dwelling on our unfulfilled desires that we miss the good that God is offering us, in the midst of the pain. The truth is, He knows what He is doing. The path He asks us to walk is not arbitrary, and He is constantly turning it to His purposes in our lives and others.
So when we find circumstances in life overwhelming, we run to Jesus. When fear rises and we worry that even God will abandon us, we cry out to Jesus. When we feel buried under the weight of our sin, we look to Jesus, leaning into His grace and mercy, the sufficiency of His sacrifice on our behalf. And when the ache of longings yet unfulfilled rise up, let us turn our eyes to gaze upon Jesus, the King who walks with us and is worth following regardless of where He leads.
Take some time to reflect on your own life. Is it generally easier or harder to trust and experience God as all that you want and need? Why is that? What does your heart tend to feel tied to - what things do you feel you need? How might God want to fulfill the underlying longing in that need?
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